What Could Have Been
by Holyknightsteve
Summary: Forced to deal with a situation she's unfamiliar with, Celes finds time to reflect on what could have been different with her life. Takes place during the Opera scene.


A/N: Wow… it's been a LONG time since I've written anything. Hope I've still got "it". Anyhoo, this is a very belated Christmas present for my VERY long time friend Hoshiko Shinomori, an amazing lady I met right here on about 9 years ago. Wow. Hard to believe. Hope you enjoy this!

_**What Could Have Been**_

_It's just a fading dream, I wish I… I wish I…_

"Damnit," cursed Celes. "That's not the line at all. What the devil is it…" Picking up the script she had tossed aside just a moment earlier, she quickly skimmed over her lines until she found what she was looking for. "It's just a fading dream… I'm the darkness… ah yes."

She sighed and tossed aside her script once again. To her, she could not be in a more ridiculous position if she had actively tried. Here she was, Celes Chere, Magitek Knight and former general of the Vector Empire, forced into this absurd role of imitating an opera singer in order to lure a well-to-do gambler out of hiding in hopes of negotiating for use of his personal airship. Normally, she would never agree to such a plan. Unfortunately for her, no one, including herself, could think of a more effective option. If she and her new friends wanted to reach Vector, she would just have to suck it up and do what she could.

The former general turned to her mirror and gazed at her reflection. Her attire was impractical and she was unsure of how to effectively walk with such a long dress and high heels. She initially frowned, but it slowly melted away as she admitted internally that, despite the impracticality of it all, it was quite a pretty outfit. She brushed a hand across the ribbons on the front of her dress and then raised it to the one in her hair. She was unused to doing much with her hair aside from straightening it out and letting it fall wherever it chose, making even tying it back in a simple ponytail feel strange to her. Like the dress, she didn't mind this either. She noted to herself that she could just about pass for a normal woman.

She shook her head and let her hand fall back to her side as she stood up straight. "What a thought," she muttered to herself. She turned away from the mirror, paused, and then turned back to it. Leaning on the dresser that the mirror was situated on, she looked at herself once more, a small smile forming on her normally humorless face. For the first time in as long as she could remember, she was happy with how she looked. Perhaps this wasn't as bad as she initially led herself to believe. She honestly felt like she could grow used to a look such as this. Maybe if things had turned out differently…

Celes was interrupted from her thoughts by a drastic change of pace in music performed by the orchestral pit just in front of the stage, mere meters away from her dressing room. Peeking outside, she could see several workers scrambling to set up the castle for her upcoming scene, hidden from the audience by the massive curtain. Realizing that time was short, she grabbed her script, skimmed over it once again, tossed it aside, and took one last look in the mirror before she walked onto the stage to take her place in the castle.

As she climbed the stairs to where she was to begin her part, she could hear the sound of the curtain being drawn aside as the narrator set the scene for the audience. Anxiety began to well up in her, something she hadn't felt in quite some time. It was strange to her to be sure. She had fought numerous battles for both the Empire and for the Returners and had thought little about them. Something about the atmosphere made her worry about how she'd appear to a crowd full of strangers. She chalked up this newfound feeling as "stage fright".

Climbing the last few stairs, she nearly tripped as she cleared the last few steps, the cause being her left foot becoming separated for its respective high heel. Silently cursing her justified clumsiness, she quickly recovered and took her place in the shadows of the back wall of the third floor of the makeshift castle. She took a deep breath and took a moment to reflect as the music continued to slow down, setting the mood for the upcoming scene.

Her whole life had revolved around magiteknology and warfare. From an early age, she was constantly experimented on as Imperial scientists attempted to unlock the secret of artificially infusing humans with magical capabilities. They were eventually successful and she was quickly rushed into military science, where, at the very young age of eighteen, she became a general in their army. Having known only these sorts of things her entire life, she never found it strange that she had involved herself in matters such as these. To be able to experience something like an opera sent a wave of new emotions through her, the most prominent of these being fear and excitement. She wondered how it would all turn out.

She didn't have to wait long. A large spotlight was shone on the balcony in front of her, between the first and second pillars. She took this as her cue. She stepped forward slowly, a choking sensation gripping her throat as she struggled to remember her first line. Forcing herself to relax before she went into a full-blown panic attack, she closed her eyes as she took the final few steps toward her place. Once stopped, she opened her eyes, spread out her arms, and began to sing.

_Oh my hero, so far away now. Will I ever see your smile? Love goes away, like night into day. It's just a fading dream…_

She turned to her right walked behind the second pillar as she started once again.

_I'm the darkness…_

She tripped, the culprit once again being her left high-heel. Fortunately for her, the pillar hid her blunder and the orchestra drowned out her curses. She did what she could to recover but couldn't waste any more time, opting to drag along her shoe with her free foot as she continued.

_You're the stars._

She brought herself to the balcony between the second and third pillars, fidgeting with her high heel behind the safety of the castle wall, spreading her arms once again and continuing her song.

_Our love is brighter than the sun._

Fixing her high-heel problem just in time, she turned around once again and walked to her left, passing the third pillar and bypassing altogether the third balcony.

_For eternity, for me there can be, only you my chosen one._

Making her way slowly around the corner, she turned to face the crowd once again, spreading her arms as she did so.

_Must I forget you? Our solemn promise? Will autumn take the place of spring?_

Turning to her right, she continued the verse as she made her way up the steps, taking all the care in the world to make sure she did not have another mishap with her footwear.

_What shall I do? I'm lost without you._

She paused halfway up the steps and looked toward where she began her scene. It struck her as humorous, seeing how much effort it had taken to travel such a short distance. If she ever planned on getting used to attire like this, she would need far more practice.

_Speak to me once more._

She made her way up the rest of the stairs and reached a low part of the roof of the castle. Looking to her left, something that appeared to be her character's love, Draco, came down a flight of stairs that led to a higher part of the roof. Was it some sort of magical illusion? Something special they did with the lights? Merely smoke and mirrors? Whatever it was, it was quite convincing and, had she not known better, she might've thought this illusion to be real.

The illusion beckoned her to follow him and she acknowledged. Had the audience been able to see the lower halves of the actor's bodies, they would have noticed that the illusion was merely floating about clumsily. Celes did her best to follow the erratic illusion's movements, nearly tripping only once during the "dance". Thankfully, once again, the audience didn't catch the misstep. Once done, the illusion chuckled and disappeared, leaving a bouquet of flowers behind. She picked up the bouquet and made her way upstairs one last time.

The audience and her friends within it never noticed it, but as she ascended, she was smiling to herself. She didn't think it possible, but, despite her blunders, she was enjoying herself. She needed work of course, but she honestly felt that this might be something she wouldn't mind doing on a regular business. But she couldn't. She had done far too many bad things and seen too many bad things for her to just simply change gears just like that. For the time, she sadly labeled this as "what could have been".

Celes made her way to the last balcony and paused at the edge. Closing her eyes, she clutched the flowers to her chest, taking their scent in. As she awaited her musical cue, she began to wonder if it was actually too late. She felt that she had been correct about not being able to switch her lot in life so quickly, but perhaps with time…

Her cue came. Eyes opened, she held out the bouquet as far in front of her as possible and began her final verse.

_We must part now. My life goes on. But my heart won't give you up._

As she spoke the most recent line, she threw the bouquet over the edge, her head unmoving but her eyes following the bouquet all the same as it slowly fell.

_Ere I walk away, let me hear you say. I meant as much to you._

Was it too late? Could she still change? Did she want a real chance at being happy?

_So gently, you touched my heart. I will be forever yours._

Is it still possible for her to be free? To make her own decisions for the first time in her life?

_Come what may, I won't age a day, I'll wait for you always…_

Yes. It was possible. She'd have to wait, as she still had a mission to accomplish with the Returners. She wasn't sure if they could actually defeat the Empire, but the thought of a life of freedom to find her own happiness would serve as a fine incentive for her.

Something that appeared to be a shooting star was barely noticed in her peripheral vision as she continued to ponder. At one point, another actor appeared behind her, saying what he had to say, and then once again heading downstairs. She hadn't heard what she said, but it didn't matter. All she needed to know was that this was her exit cue. However, one line did stick out in her mind: "Leave the past behind!"

She started to walk toward the stairs and turned around once more. Looking at the artificial night sky, she smiled and nodded to herself. "I no longer wish to think of this as "what could have been"," she thought to herself. "From now on, this shall be "what could still be"." Satisfied with her new resolve, she made her way down the stairs, surprisingly gracefully, and made her way off the stage.

And well… that's it! I REALLY hope you enjoyed this! If I continue to write other things after this, I have to decide whether or not I wish to continue using this old profile or if I should start anew, but that's a concern for another day. Thanks for reading everyone, and thank you so much Hoshi for always being the friend I was never truly worthy of but you found in your heart to be kind to me anyway. You're awesome!


End file.
